rambles, races, and reality

we all write these scripts of our daily lives. to-do lists of all our dreams and goals. saddened by the end of the day of all our wasted time spent on what, we can't even remember.

then it hits us. if i plan a little bit longer and try a little bit harder, i will accomplish my goals.

the cycle continues until you've abandoned everything. you've traded in your schedule for another evening lounging watching tv. all those well thought out plans slip into oblivion, the only reminder left is the scribbling in your planner from weeks before, reminding you of failure.

i can't be the only one. i know i'm not.

back in january i posted a mini-post on instagram about keeping up with the Jones'. forget the Jones'. my life has revolved around them. my bank account, or lack there of is dwindled down each month trying to find something to help me fill the void failure has left. the pile of books left untouched. the list of books itching to be bought. the tabs on my iphone kept, to remind me of all that "they" have and accomplished.

slowing down. taking a step back, realizing i've had the same goals for almost ten years and i'm not accomplishing them. life is funny in that respect. it's like a race that has no end, and we're allowed to take as many breaks as possible. if there's no end, then what's the point.

what's the point? the point is start a race that has an end or you'll be forever failing at a race that never ends.